Again I am truly thankful for teachers who are willing to share their ideas on how best to tackle the report writing question. Below are almost exhaustible versions of answers for each of the sections (Title, Intro, Overview, Analyses, Syntheses & Conclusions = TIOASCs). Also given at the end are two suggested answers that have very good combination of Analyses and Synthesis. Hope this helps enlighten both teachers and students on how best to answer the report section.
MUET Writing March 2016
Question 1 - Suggested TIOASCs
Title
1. (Number of) Heart Attack Cases among Men and Women and Activities Performed (2011-2015).
2. Heart Attacks Suffered by Men and Women (2011-2015) and Activities Performed (for 5 Years) (2011-2015)
Introduction
1. Figure 1/ The line graph shows/depicts/illustrates the number of heart attack cases among men and women while Figure 2 / the table lists their activities from 2011 to 2015.
2. Figure 1 shows/depicts/illustrates the number of heart attack cases among men and women from 2011 to 2015. (while) Figure 2 lists their activities in the same 5 years.
Overview
1. Generally, there is a (positive) correlation / relationship between the number of activities performed by / of men and women and the number of heart attack cases (they suffered/among them) (in the 5 years).
2. Generally, the number of heart attack(s) (cases) (suffered by/among both sexes) correlates/corresponds with the number of activities performed (by them).
3. Generally, the more activities a (certain) gender/sex performed the more (cases of) heart attacks occurred among it in that year (and vice versa).
4. Generally, (the number of) heart attack(s) (cases) was higher among the 2 genders/sexes when the number of activities performed by them was more and vice versa.
5. Generally, when the number of activities of men increased they suffered more heart attacks/more of them suffered heart attacks while women suffered lesser/there were fewer cases among women when their activities were fewer.
6. Generally, the number of cases increased among men when the number of their activities increased and fell when activities were dropped while cases among women dropped when they performed fewer activities.
7. Generally, the more the number of activities of a gender/a gender performed, the more heart attack cases it suffered/occurred among its members/them.
8. Generally, the more activities men performed the more men/they/of them suffered heart attacks while the fewer the activities women performed the fewer women/of them/lesser they suffered (from) heart attacks.
9. Generally, an increase in activities lead/corresponded to an increase in heart attack cases while a decrease in activities led/corresponded to a drop in cases.
10. Generally, the more activities a gender performed, the more heart attack cases it suffered and vice versa.
11. Meeting clients and managing staff problems may have contributed to the increase in / a higher number of heart attack cases among men over the years while attending to children may be responsible for women suffering comparatively fewer heart attacks than men.
12. Attending meetings, (and) managing staff problems (and meeting clients) may have contributed to more heart attack cases while attending to children may be responsible for fewer cases.
13. Higher incidences of heart attacks among men especially may be attributed to ‘Attend meeting,’ ‘Manage staff problems’ and ‘Meet clients’ activities while the fewer cases among women may be attributed to ‘Attend to children.’
14. There may be a (causal) relationship/link between the type of activities performed by the different genders and the number of attacks they suffered/number of cases among them.
15. There may be a (causal) relationship/link between the type of activities performed and the number of heart attack cases.
16. The number of heart attack cases was always higher/more among men than among women when/as/because/and the former generally performed more activities (than the latter).
17. The number of heart attack cases among men and the number of activities performed (by men/ them) (except in 2011) was/were always higher than women.
18. Men always suffered from more heart attacks than women and they generally performed more activities (throughout the 5 years).
19. Except for 2011, men always performed more activities than women and always suffered from more heart attacks than women.
20. More men than women suffered heart attack cases (every year) as/and they, except in 2011, also performed more activities (than women)
Analysis
1. In 2011, there were more heart attack cases among men (320) than women (150).
2. The number of heart attack cases was higher among men (320) than/compared to women (150) in 2011.
3. In 2011, there was a higher number of heart attack cases among men (320) than women (150).
4. In 2011, men suffered more heart attack(s) (cases) (320) than women (150).
5. In 2011, more men (320) had/suffered (from) heart attacks than women (150).
6. In 2011, there were lesser/fewer heart attack cases among women (150) than men (320).
7. Fewer/Lesser women suffered heart attacks (150) than men (320) in 2011.
8. In the following 4 years / 2012, 2013, 2014 and 2015, there continued to be/were more (heart attack) cases among men than women – 380 vs 100, 450 vs 100, 600 vs 100 and 500 vs 80 respectively.
9. The number of heart attack cases was always higher among men than women – 320 vs 150(2011), 380 vs 100(2012), 450 vs 100(2013), 600 vs 100(2014) and 500 vs 80(2015).
10. The number of heart attack cases among men kept increasing/rising from its lowest at/of 320 in 2011 to its highest of/at 600 in 2014 and then dropped to 500 in 2015.
11. On the other hand/Conversely/On the contrary, the number of cases among women which was at its highest at/of 150 in 2011 dropped to 100 in 2012 and remained the same/retained the same figure/number of cases at/of 100 in 2013 and 2014. Then, there was a (further) slight/small drop in 2015 to its lowest of/at 80 cases.
12. From 320 cases in 2011 the number of heart attack cases among men increased to 380 in 2012.
13. The number of cases among women dropped to 100 in 2012 from 150 in 2011.
14. From its highest number of cases/figure of (600) in 2014, the number of heart attack cases dropped to 500 in 2015.
15. The difference in the number of heart attack cases between men and women was the smallest (170) in 2011 and the largest/biggest/greatest in 2014 (500).
16. The difference in the number of heart attack cases between men and women was the smallest (170) in 2011 and kept increasing/rising to 280 in 2012, 350 in 2013 and to its/(the) largest/biggest/greatest/ (widest gap) of/at 500 in 2014. The gap/difference though narrowed to 420 in 2015 was still bigger than in the first 3 years/2011, 2012 and 2013.
17. There were more heart attack cases among men (2250) than women (530) over the 5 years.
18. More men (2250) than women (530) suffered from heart attacks from 2011 to 2015.
19. Heart attack cases (among women)(150) was the highest(150) (among women) (150) in 2011 while the most number of cases for/involving / among men was 600 in 2014
20. The lowest/least/smallest number of cases involving men (320) was in 2011 while the smallest number of cases among women was 80 in 2015.
21. In 2011, women performed more activities (3 - ‘Complete office work,’ ‘Attend meetings,’ ‘Attend to children’) than men (2 – ‘Complete office work,’ ‘ Meet clients’).
22. On the other hand, in 2012, 2013 2014 and 2015 men performed more activities compared to women – 3 vs 2, 3 vs 2, 4 vs 2 and 3 vs 1 activities respectively.
23. Men performed the least number of activities in 2011(2) and the most number in 2014 (4), while in 2012, 2013 and 2015 they performed the same 3 activities.
24. Men performed/carried out the same 3 activities (‘Complete office work,’ ‘Attend meeting,’ ‘Meet clients’) in 2012 and 2013 while women performed their same 2 activities (‘Complete office work,’ ;Attend to children’) in 2012, 2013 and 2014.
25. ‘Complete office work’ was (always) performed (every year) by both sexes except by women in 2015.
26. ‘Manage staff problems’ was performed only by men and only once in 2014.
27. Men ‘Attended/Attend to children’ only (once) in 2015 while women did so in all 5 years. / Women ‘Attend to children’ every year while men did so only (once) in 2015.
28. Men ‘Meet/met clients’ in all 5 years while women never did so (even once)./ Only men ‘Meet clients’ / met clients every year but women never once did so.
Synthesis
1. In 2011, the number of heart attack cases was higher among men (320) than women (150) and/but/although the latter/women performed more (3) activities – ‘Complete office work,’ ‘Attend meetings,’ (and) ‘Attend to children’ than/compared to the former/men who (performed 2 activities/did) ‘Complete office work,’ (and) ‘Meet clients’.
2. In 2011, the number of heart attack cases was higher among men (320) than women (150) and/but/although the former/men performed fewer/lesser (2) activities - ‘Complete office work,’ ‘Meet clients’ than/compared to the latter/women who performed more (3) activities – ‘Complete office work,’ ‘Attend meetings, ‘Attend to children’.
3. In 2011, there were more heart attack(s) (cases) among men (320) than women (150) but/although men performed fewer/lesser activities (2) than women (3)
4. In 2011, men performed fewer/lesser activities (2) than women (3) but/and there were more heart attack(s) (cases) among men (320) than women (150).
5. In 2011, there were more heart attack(s) (cases) among men (320) than women (150) despite men performing fewer/lesser activities (2) than women (3).
6. In 2011, there were more heart attack(s) (cases) among men (320) than women (150) despite women performing more activities (3) than men (2)
7. In 2011, more men (320) suffered from heart attacks compared to women (150) but / (although they) performed lesser/fewer activities (2) – ‘Complete office work, ‘Meet clients’ compared to women who did more (3) - ‘Complete office work,’ ‘Attend meetings, and ‘Attend to children’
8. There was a higher number of heart attack(s) (cases) among men (320) than women (150) in 2011 and / but / although men performed fewer/lesser (2) activities than women (3).
9. Although women performed more activities (3) than men (2), there were more heart attack(s) (cases) among men (320) than women (150) in 2011.
10. Although men performed fewer/lesser activities (2) than women (3), there were more heart attack(s) (cases) among men (320) than women (150) in 2011.
11. Although men performed fewer/lesser activities (2) than women (3), they suffered more heart attack(s) (cases) (320) than women (150) in 2011.
12. Although men performed fewer/lesser activities (2) than women (3), more men (320) than women (150) suffered from heart attacks in 2011.
13. In 2012, the number of (heart attack) cases among men increased/rose to 380 (from 320 in 2011) when/as/because they performed an extra activity (totaling 3) – ‘Attend meetings.’
14. When/As/Because they performed an extra activity (totaling 3) – ‘Attend meetings’, (in 2012), the number of (heart attack) cases among men increased/rose to 380 (in 2012) (from 320 in 2011).
15. Heart attack cases among women dropped to 100 in 2012 (from 150 in 2011) when they performed 2 activities and gave/giving up ‘Attend meetings’
16. When men did an extra activity (‘Attend meetings’), totaling 3 in 2012, the heart attack cases increased/rose to 380.
17. Conversely, women who did less/lesser/fewer activities (2), dropping ‘Attend meetings’, suffered 50 lesser/fewer attacks (and numbering) (100) (in 2012).
18. More men (380) suffered from heart attacks in 2012(380) than in 2011 (320) when/as/because they performed more (3) activities (3) in 2012 compared to 2 / than 2 in 2011.
19. Although men continued performing the same 3 activities in 2013 (as in 2012), the number of cases further rose to 450.
20. Despite performing the same 3 activities in 2013 (as in 2012), the number of heart attack cases among men rose to 450/the number of men who suffered (from) heart attacks increased to 450.
21. Women continued to suffer from the same number of cases (100) in 2013 when/as/because they continued to perform the same 2 activities as in 2012.
22. In 2012. 2013 and 2014 the number of cases among women was the same 100 as/and their 2 activities were also the same (‘Complete office work,’ ‘Attend to children’).
23. As the activities performed by women in 2012, 2013 and 2014 were the same 2 ‘Complete office work’ and ‘Attend to children’, the number of heart attack cases were also the same at 100.
24. In 2013, the number of cases among women remained the same 100 (as in 2012) as they performed the same 2 activities of 2012. However, cases among men increased to 450 although their 3 activities were the same as in 2012 / although they performed the same 3 activities as in 2012.
25. In 2014, the number of cases among men shot to its highest of (600) as/when/because they performed the most number (4) of activities in that year.
26. In 2014, women suffered the same 100 heart attacks as in 2012 and 2013 when/because/as they continued to perform the same 2 activities of 2012 and 2013/of the 2 previous years..
27. When the number of (activities of men increased/activities men performed increased) to 4 in 2014, the number of cases involving men/them shot up to its highest of 600.
28. Despite men continuing/Although men continued to perform the/with the same 3 activities in 2013 (as in 2012), the number of heart attack cases among them rose to 450. This figure further shot up to its highest (600) in 2014 when the number of activities increased to 4, when men included ‘Manage staff problems.’
29. The number of men who suffered from heart attacks was the highest at 600 in 2014 when they performed 4 activities, the highest number in any one year.
30. Heart attack cases (among women)(150) was the highest/most/biggest (150) (among women) (150) in 2011 when they performed 3 activities (the most in any year) while the most/biggest/largest/highest number of cases for/involving/ among men was 600 in 2014 when they performed 4 activities, the highest in any one year.
31. The lowest/least/smallest number of cases involving men (320) was in 2011 when they performed 3 activities while the smallest number of cases among women was 80 in 2015 when they performed only ‘Attend to children.’
32. The number of heart attack cases among men was the highest (600) in 2014 when they performed 4 or the most number of activities ever while it was the smallest (320) in 2011 when the activities performed was the fewest (2) ever.
33. (The number of) Heart attack cases among women was the (biggest) / highest (150) in 2011 when they performed 3 or the most number of activities ever while it was the smallest (80) in 2015 when the activities performed was the sole ‘Attend to children’ and the fewest (1) ever.
34. In 2015, the number of cases involving women dropped to its lowest/smallest (80) when they only performed ‘Attend to children’ / attended to children only.
35. Similarly, cases involving men also fell to 500 when they stopped/did not ‘Attend meetings’, performing 3 activities, one less/lesser than in 2014.
36. Performing the most number (4) of activities ever, the number of heart attack cases among men was the biggest (600) ever in 2014 / men were involved in the biggest (600) number of heart attack cases in 2014. In the following year, when men dropped 2 activities (‘Attend meetings,’ ‘Manage staff problems’) and adopted/performed a new one (‘Attend to children’), making it a total of 3 activities, the number of cases dropped to 500.
37. The number of men who suffered from heart attacks dropped by 100, from 600 in 2014 to 500 in 2015 when they performed one less activity, i.e., when they dropped 2 activities – ‘Attend meetings’ and ‘Manage staff problems’ and took upadopted/performed a new one, ‘Attend to children.’
38. The number of heart attack(s) (cases) declined for both sexes to 500 (men) and 80 (women) in 2015 as they did one less activity each – men (3) and women (‘Attend to children’) only.
39. Dropping one activity/Performing one less activity (‘Attend meetings’) led to a (bigger) drop of 50 heart attack cases among women in 2012, (bigger) compared to when women dropped one activity/ performed one less activity (‘Complete office work’) in 2015 when the fall in the number of cases was only 20.
40. The fall in the number of heart attack cases among men from 2014 to 2015 was (five times) bigger/fivefold (100) compared to women (20) although both genders performed one less activity than the previous year/dropped one activity from the previous year.
Conclusion
1. In conclusion, there is generally a correlation/a corresponding link between the number of heart attack cases and activities performed.
2. In conclusion, heart attack cases were generally more/higher among men who/as they performed more activities.
3. In conclusion, heart attack cases were generally fewer among women who/as performed fewer activities.
4. In conclusion, the number of heart attack cases was generally higher for both sexes/genders/man and women in the years when they performed more activities.
MUET Writing March 2016
Question 1 – Suggested Answer 1
Number of Heart Attack Cases and Activities of Men and Women (2011-2015)
Figure 1 illustrates the number of heart attacks among men and women while Figure 2 lists their activities (2011-2015).Generally, there is a positive correlation between the number of heart attacks cases and the number of activities of both sexes.
In 2011, more men (320) had heart attacks than women (150) although women performed more (3) activities (‘Complete office work,’ ‘Attend meetings,’ ‘Attend to children’) compared to men (2)(‘Complete office work,’ ‘Meet clients’). When men did an extra activity (‘Attend meetings’), totaling 3 in 2012, the attacks increased to 380. Conversely, women who did less (2), dropping ‘Attend meetings’, suffered 50 lesser attacks (100)( in 2012).
Despite (performing) the same 3 activities in 2013, the number of heart attacks suffered by men rose to 450. This figure further shot up to its highest (600) in 2014 when the number of activities increased to 4, when men included an extra ‘Manage staff problems.’ The number of attacks women suffered (100) and the 2 activities in 2013 and 2014 respectively, remained unchanged as in 2012.
The number of attacks declined for both sexes to 500 (men) and 80 (women) in 2015 as they did one less activity each – men (3) and women (‘Attend to children’) only.
In conclusion, the number of heart attacks and activities are correlated.
(200 words)
(There is a Title, an Intro, an OV, 12 Analyses and 7 Syntheses and a Conclusion)
MUET Writing March 2016
Question 1 – Suggested Answer 2
Number of Heart Attack Cases and Activities Performed by Men and Women (2011-2015).
Figure 1 illustrates the number of heart attacks among men and women while Figure 2 lists their activities (2011-2015). Generally, there is a correlation between the number of activities and the number of attacks. (32)
In 2011, the number of cases was higher among men (320) than women (150) although women performed more (3) activities – ‘Complete office work,’ ‘Attend meetings,’ and ‘Attend to children’ compared to men who performed 2 activities, ‘Complete office work,’ and ‘Meet clients’ (34)
An extra activity ‘Attend meetings’ increased the number of cases among men to 380 while giving up ‘Attend meetings’ reduced cases among women to 100 in 2012.(25)
Although men performed the same 3 activities in 2013, cases rose to 450. This figure further shot up to its highest (600) in 2014 when activities increased to include a fourth ‘Manage staff problems.’ (32)
As the activities performed by women in 2013 and 2014 were the same 2 ‘Complete office work’ and ‘Attend to children’, the number of cases also remained the same at 100 as in 2012. (30)
The number of cases declined for both sexes to 500 (men) and 80 (women) in 2015 as they did one less activity each – men (3) and women (‘Attend to children’) only. (29)
In conclusion, the number of cases was generally higher for both sexes when they performed more activities. (17)
199 words
(This suggested answer has Title, Intro, OV, 11 As, 7Ss, C)
MUET Writing March 2016
Question 1 - Suggested TIOASCs
Title
1. (Number of) Heart Attack Cases among Men and Women and Activities Performed (2011-2015).
2. Heart Attacks Suffered by Men and Women (2011-2015) and Activities Performed (for 5 Years) (2011-2015)
Introduction
1. Figure 1/ The line graph shows/depicts/illustrates the number of heart attack cases among men and women while Figure 2 / the table lists their activities from 2011 to 2015.
2. Figure 1 shows/depicts/illustrates the number of heart attack cases among men and women from 2011 to 2015. (while) Figure 2 lists their activities in the same 5 years.
Overview
1. Generally, there is a (positive) correlation / relationship between the number of activities performed by / of men and women and the number of heart attack cases (they suffered/among them) (in the 5 years).
2. Generally, the number of heart attack(s) (cases) (suffered by/among both sexes) correlates/corresponds with the number of activities performed (by them).
3. Generally, the more activities a (certain) gender/sex performed the more (cases of) heart attacks occurred among it in that year (and vice versa).
4. Generally, (the number of) heart attack(s) (cases) was higher among the 2 genders/sexes when the number of activities performed by them was more and vice versa.
5. Generally, when the number of activities of men increased they suffered more heart attacks/more of them suffered heart attacks while women suffered lesser/there were fewer cases among women when their activities were fewer.
6. Generally, the number of cases increased among men when the number of their activities increased and fell when activities were dropped while cases among women dropped when they performed fewer activities.
7. Generally, the more the number of activities of a gender/a gender performed, the more heart attack cases it suffered/occurred among its members/them.
8. Generally, the more activities men performed the more men/they/of them suffered heart attacks while the fewer the activities women performed the fewer women/of them/lesser they suffered (from) heart attacks.
9. Generally, an increase in activities lead/corresponded to an increase in heart attack cases while a decrease in activities led/corresponded to a drop in cases.
10. Generally, the more activities a gender performed, the more heart attack cases it suffered and vice versa.
11. Meeting clients and managing staff problems may have contributed to the increase in / a higher number of heart attack cases among men over the years while attending to children may be responsible for women suffering comparatively fewer heart attacks than men.
12. Attending meetings, (and) managing staff problems (and meeting clients) may have contributed to more heart attack cases while attending to children may be responsible for fewer cases.
13. Higher incidences of heart attacks among men especially may be attributed to ‘Attend meeting,’ ‘Manage staff problems’ and ‘Meet clients’ activities while the fewer cases among women may be attributed to ‘Attend to children.’
14. There may be a (causal) relationship/link between the type of activities performed by the different genders and the number of attacks they suffered/number of cases among them.
15. There may be a (causal) relationship/link between the type of activities performed and the number of heart attack cases.
16. The number of heart attack cases was always higher/more among men than among women when/as/because/and the former generally performed more activities (than the latter).
17. The number of heart attack cases among men and the number of activities performed (by men/ them) (except in 2011) was/were always higher than women.
18. Men always suffered from more heart attacks than women and they generally performed more activities (throughout the 5 years).
19. Except for 2011, men always performed more activities than women and always suffered from more heart attacks than women.
20. More men than women suffered heart attack cases (every year) as/and they, except in 2011, also performed more activities (than women)
Analysis
1. In 2011, there were more heart attack cases among men (320) than women (150).
2. The number of heart attack cases was higher among men (320) than/compared to women (150) in 2011.
3. In 2011, there was a higher number of heart attack cases among men (320) than women (150).
4. In 2011, men suffered more heart attack(s) (cases) (320) than women (150).
5. In 2011, more men (320) had/suffered (from) heart attacks than women (150).
6. In 2011, there were lesser/fewer heart attack cases among women (150) than men (320).
7. Fewer/Lesser women suffered heart attacks (150) than men (320) in 2011.
8. In the following 4 years / 2012, 2013, 2014 and 2015, there continued to be/were more (heart attack) cases among men than women – 380 vs 100, 450 vs 100, 600 vs 100 and 500 vs 80 respectively.
9. The number of heart attack cases was always higher among men than women – 320 vs 150(2011), 380 vs 100(2012), 450 vs 100(2013), 600 vs 100(2014) and 500 vs 80(2015).
10. The number of heart attack cases among men kept increasing/rising from its lowest at/of 320 in 2011 to its highest of/at 600 in 2014 and then dropped to 500 in 2015.
11. On the other hand/Conversely/On the contrary, the number of cases among women which was at its highest at/of 150 in 2011 dropped to 100 in 2012 and remained the same/retained the same figure/number of cases at/of 100 in 2013 and 2014. Then, there was a (further) slight/small drop in 2015 to its lowest of/at 80 cases.
12. From 320 cases in 2011 the number of heart attack cases among men increased to 380 in 2012.
13. The number of cases among women dropped to 100 in 2012 from 150 in 2011.
14. From its highest number of cases/figure of (600) in 2014, the number of heart attack cases dropped to 500 in 2015.
15. The difference in the number of heart attack cases between men and women was the smallest (170) in 2011 and the largest/biggest/greatest in 2014 (500).
16. The difference in the number of heart attack cases between men and women was the smallest (170) in 2011 and kept increasing/rising to 280 in 2012, 350 in 2013 and to its/(the) largest/biggest/greatest/ (widest gap) of/at 500 in 2014. The gap/difference though narrowed to 420 in 2015 was still bigger than in the first 3 years/2011, 2012 and 2013.
17. There were more heart attack cases among men (2250) than women (530) over the 5 years.
18. More men (2250) than women (530) suffered from heart attacks from 2011 to 2015.
19. Heart attack cases (among women)(150) was the highest(150) (among women) (150) in 2011 while the most number of cases for/involving / among men was 600 in 2014
20. The lowest/least/smallest number of cases involving men (320) was in 2011 while the smallest number of cases among women was 80 in 2015.
21. In 2011, women performed more activities (3 - ‘Complete office work,’ ‘Attend meetings,’ ‘Attend to children’) than men (2 – ‘Complete office work,’ ‘ Meet clients’).
22. On the other hand, in 2012, 2013 2014 and 2015 men performed more activities compared to women – 3 vs 2, 3 vs 2, 4 vs 2 and 3 vs 1 activities respectively.
23. Men performed the least number of activities in 2011(2) and the most number in 2014 (4), while in 2012, 2013 and 2015 they performed the same 3 activities.
24. Men performed/carried out the same 3 activities (‘Complete office work,’ ‘Attend meeting,’ ‘Meet clients’) in 2012 and 2013 while women performed their same 2 activities (‘Complete office work,’ ;Attend to children’) in 2012, 2013 and 2014.
25. ‘Complete office work’ was (always) performed (every year) by both sexes except by women in 2015.
26. ‘Manage staff problems’ was performed only by men and only once in 2014.
27. Men ‘Attended/Attend to children’ only (once) in 2015 while women did so in all 5 years. / Women ‘Attend to children’ every year while men did so only (once) in 2015.
28. Men ‘Meet/met clients’ in all 5 years while women never did so (even once)./ Only men ‘Meet clients’ / met clients every year but women never once did so.
Synthesis
1. In 2011, the number of heart attack cases was higher among men (320) than women (150) and/but/although the latter/women performed more (3) activities – ‘Complete office work,’ ‘Attend meetings,’ (and) ‘Attend to children’ than/compared to the former/men who (performed 2 activities/did) ‘Complete office work,’ (and) ‘Meet clients’.
2. In 2011, the number of heart attack cases was higher among men (320) than women (150) and/but/although the former/men performed fewer/lesser (2) activities - ‘Complete office work,’ ‘Meet clients’ than/compared to the latter/women who performed more (3) activities – ‘Complete office work,’ ‘Attend meetings, ‘Attend to children’.
3. In 2011, there were more heart attack(s) (cases) among men (320) than women (150) but/although men performed fewer/lesser activities (2) than women (3)
4. In 2011, men performed fewer/lesser activities (2) than women (3) but/and there were more heart attack(s) (cases) among men (320) than women (150).
5. In 2011, there were more heart attack(s) (cases) among men (320) than women (150) despite men performing fewer/lesser activities (2) than women (3).
6. In 2011, there were more heart attack(s) (cases) among men (320) than women (150) despite women performing more activities (3) than men (2)
7. In 2011, more men (320) suffered from heart attacks compared to women (150) but / (although they) performed lesser/fewer activities (2) – ‘Complete office work, ‘Meet clients’ compared to women who did more (3) - ‘Complete office work,’ ‘Attend meetings, and ‘Attend to children’
8. There was a higher number of heart attack(s) (cases) among men (320) than women (150) in 2011 and / but / although men performed fewer/lesser (2) activities than women (3).
9. Although women performed more activities (3) than men (2), there were more heart attack(s) (cases) among men (320) than women (150) in 2011.
10. Although men performed fewer/lesser activities (2) than women (3), there were more heart attack(s) (cases) among men (320) than women (150) in 2011.
11. Although men performed fewer/lesser activities (2) than women (3), they suffered more heart attack(s) (cases) (320) than women (150) in 2011.
12. Although men performed fewer/lesser activities (2) than women (3), more men (320) than women (150) suffered from heart attacks in 2011.
13. In 2012, the number of (heart attack) cases among men increased/rose to 380 (from 320 in 2011) when/as/because they performed an extra activity (totaling 3) – ‘Attend meetings.’
14. When/As/Because they performed an extra activity (totaling 3) – ‘Attend meetings’, (in 2012), the number of (heart attack) cases among men increased/rose to 380 (in 2012) (from 320 in 2011).
15. Heart attack cases among women dropped to 100 in 2012 (from 150 in 2011) when they performed 2 activities and gave/giving up ‘Attend meetings’
16. When men did an extra activity (‘Attend meetings’), totaling 3 in 2012, the heart attack cases increased/rose to 380.
17. Conversely, women who did less/lesser/fewer activities (2), dropping ‘Attend meetings’, suffered 50 lesser/fewer attacks (and numbering) (100) (in 2012).
18. More men (380) suffered from heart attacks in 2012(380) than in 2011 (320) when/as/because they performed more (3) activities (3) in 2012 compared to 2 / than 2 in 2011.
19. Although men continued performing the same 3 activities in 2013 (as in 2012), the number of cases further rose to 450.
20. Despite performing the same 3 activities in 2013 (as in 2012), the number of heart attack cases among men rose to 450/the number of men who suffered (from) heart attacks increased to 450.
21. Women continued to suffer from the same number of cases (100) in 2013 when/as/because they continued to perform the same 2 activities as in 2012.
22. In 2012. 2013 and 2014 the number of cases among women was the same 100 as/and their 2 activities were also the same (‘Complete office work,’ ‘Attend to children’).
23. As the activities performed by women in 2012, 2013 and 2014 were the same 2 ‘Complete office work’ and ‘Attend to children’, the number of heart attack cases were also the same at 100.
24. In 2013, the number of cases among women remained the same 100 (as in 2012) as they performed the same 2 activities of 2012. However, cases among men increased to 450 although their 3 activities were the same as in 2012 / although they performed the same 3 activities as in 2012.
25. In 2014, the number of cases among men shot to its highest of (600) as/when/because they performed the most number (4) of activities in that year.
26. In 2014, women suffered the same 100 heart attacks as in 2012 and 2013 when/because/as they continued to perform the same 2 activities of 2012 and 2013/of the 2 previous years..
27. When the number of (activities of men increased/activities men performed increased) to 4 in 2014, the number of cases involving men/them shot up to its highest of 600.
28. Despite men continuing/Although men continued to perform the/with the same 3 activities in 2013 (as in 2012), the number of heart attack cases among them rose to 450. This figure further shot up to its highest (600) in 2014 when the number of activities increased to 4, when men included ‘Manage staff problems.’
29. The number of men who suffered from heart attacks was the highest at 600 in 2014 when they performed 4 activities, the highest number in any one year.
30. Heart attack cases (among women)(150) was the highest/most/biggest (150) (among women) (150) in 2011 when they performed 3 activities (the most in any year) while the most/biggest/largest/highest number of cases for/involving/ among men was 600 in 2014 when they performed 4 activities, the highest in any one year.
31. The lowest/least/smallest number of cases involving men (320) was in 2011 when they performed 3 activities while the smallest number of cases among women was 80 in 2015 when they performed only ‘Attend to children.’
32. The number of heart attack cases among men was the highest (600) in 2014 when they performed 4 or the most number of activities ever while it was the smallest (320) in 2011 when the activities performed was the fewest (2) ever.
33. (The number of) Heart attack cases among women was the (biggest) / highest (150) in 2011 when they performed 3 or the most number of activities ever while it was the smallest (80) in 2015 when the activities performed was the sole ‘Attend to children’ and the fewest (1) ever.
34. In 2015, the number of cases involving women dropped to its lowest/smallest (80) when they only performed ‘Attend to children’ / attended to children only.
35. Similarly, cases involving men also fell to 500 when they stopped/did not ‘Attend meetings’, performing 3 activities, one less/lesser than in 2014.
36. Performing the most number (4) of activities ever, the number of heart attack cases among men was the biggest (600) ever in 2014 / men were involved in the biggest (600) number of heart attack cases in 2014. In the following year, when men dropped 2 activities (‘Attend meetings,’ ‘Manage staff problems’) and adopted/performed a new one (‘Attend to children’), making it a total of 3 activities, the number of cases dropped to 500.
37. The number of men who suffered from heart attacks dropped by 100, from 600 in 2014 to 500 in 2015 when they performed one less activity, i.e., when they dropped 2 activities – ‘Attend meetings’ and ‘Manage staff problems’ and took upadopted/performed a new one, ‘Attend to children.’
38. The number of heart attack(s) (cases) declined for both sexes to 500 (men) and 80 (women) in 2015 as they did one less activity each – men (3) and women (‘Attend to children’) only.
39. Dropping one activity/Performing one less activity (‘Attend meetings’) led to a (bigger) drop of 50 heart attack cases among women in 2012, (bigger) compared to when women dropped one activity/ performed one less activity (‘Complete office work’) in 2015 when the fall in the number of cases was only 20.
40. The fall in the number of heart attack cases among men from 2014 to 2015 was (five times) bigger/fivefold (100) compared to women (20) although both genders performed one less activity than the previous year/dropped one activity from the previous year.
Conclusion
1. In conclusion, there is generally a correlation/a corresponding link between the number of heart attack cases and activities performed.
2. In conclusion, heart attack cases were generally more/higher among men who/as they performed more activities.
3. In conclusion, heart attack cases were generally fewer among women who/as performed fewer activities.
4. In conclusion, the number of heart attack cases was generally higher for both sexes/genders/man and women in the years when they performed more activities.
MUET Writing March 2016
Question 1 – Suggested Answer 1
Number of Heart Attack Cases and Activities of Men and Women (2011-2015)
Figure 1 illustrates the number of heart attacks among men and women while Figure 2 lists their activities (2011-2015).Generally, there is a positive correlation between the number of heart attacks cases and the number of activities of both sexes.
In 2011, more men (320) had heart attacks than women (150) although women performed more (3) activities (‘Complete office work,’ ‘Attend meetings,’ ‘Attend to children’) compared to men (2)(‘Complete office work,’ ‘Meet clients’). When men did an extra activity (‘Attend meetings’), totaling 3 in 2012, the attacks increased to 380. Conversely, women who did less (2), dropping ‘Attend meetings’, suffered 50 lesser attacks (100)( in 2012).
Despite (performing) the same 3 activities in 2013, the number of heart attacks suffered by men rose to 450. This figure further shot up to its highest (600) in 2014 when the number of activities increased to 4, when men included an extra ‘Manage staff problems.’ The number of attacks women suffered (100) and the 2 activities in 2013 and 2014 respectively, remained unchanged as in 2012.
The number of attacks declined for both sexes to 500 (men) and 80 (women) in 2015 as they did one less activity each – men (3) and women (‘Attend to children’) only.
In conclusion, the number of heart attacks and activities are correlated.
(200 words)
(There is a Title, an Intro, an OV, 12 Analyses and 7 Syntheses and a Conclusion)
MUET Writing March 2016
Question 1 – Suggested Answer 2
Number of Heart Attack Cases and Activities Performed by Men and Women (2011-2015).
Figure 1 illustrates the number of heart attacks among men and women while Figure 2 lists their activities (2011-2015). Generally, there is a correlation between the number of activities and the number of attacks. (32)
In 2011, the number of cases was higher among men (320) than women (150) although women performed more (3) activities – ‘Complete office work,’ ‘Attend meetings,’ and ‘Attend to children’ compared to men who performed 2 activities, ‘Complete office work,’ and ‘Meet clients’ (34)
An extra activity ‘Attend meetings’ increased the number of cases among men to 380 while giving up ‘Attend meetings’ reduced cases among women to 100 in 2012.(25)
Although men performed the same 3 activities in 2013, cases rose to 450. This figure further shot up to its highest (600) in 2014 when activities increased to include a fourth ‘Manage staff problems.’ (32)
As the activities performed by women in 2013 and 2014 were the same 2 ‘Complete office work’ and ‘Attend to children’, the number of cases also remained the same at 100 as in 2012. (30)
The number of cases declined for both sexes to 500 (men) and 80 (women) in 2015 as they did one less activity each – men (3) and women (‘Attend to children’) only. (29)
In conclusion, the number of cases was generally higher for both sexes when they performed more activities. (17)
199 words
(This suggested answer has Title, Intro, OV, 11 As, 7Ss, C)